TOP TEN TIPS for labour partners

1

Early on in labour, begin massage and acupressure.  This non-verbal communication will be so useful later on.

2

When the labour is underway, remind her to take a sip to drink regularly.  Drinking is more important than eating.

3

Ask "yes/no" questions.  She may not be able to articulate an answer to an open ended question in that moment.  Is that another contraction coming?  Are you warm enough?  Would you like to change position?  When you get your 'yes/no' answer, understand that she could change her mind any minute.

4

Be her minder.  If she has been labouring in the same position for a long time, does she need to move? She may be getting stiff and not have noticed.  If she is barefoot, is the floor cold?  Does she need lip-balm?  A cool flannel on the forehead? 

5

Try to work out when to just be present and quiet, and when to step in and ask what she needs.  Mostly what she needs is to focus deep inside herself.

6

Give encouragement: a whole year's worth of encouragement. 

7

If you are lovers, do kissing.

8

Imagine each surge (contraction) like a wave rolling in from the horizon, getting bigger and bigger and breaking on the shore.  Then pulling back, gathering strength, in preparation for the next one.

9

It's all about the breathing.  Maybe try breathing with her - a long, very long breath out through soft lips through the peak of the surge will allow her to ride the wave.

10

Do find a suitable moment to take a break: go for a walk if your energy is stagnating, or rest down if you are tired.  A labour is like a journey, in chapters: rest down and then move on. 

Bon voyage!


What to take with you


  • Bendy straws - so that she can drink without having to change position.
  • Coconut water is good for maintaining hydration, better than water as the labour progresses.  Available in supermarkets: get two!
  • Lip balm.  And a completely plain massage oil (that could be used on the perineum as the baby crowns).
  • Good snacks for you both.  She is unlikely to tolerate food that smells strong, or the smells of cooking.
  • A cushion or pillow you can kneel on - a large floor cushion or a thick mat.
  • A light shawl or soft cardigan that you could put over her shoulders while you are labouring - you may throw it off, that's ok.  Be ready when the baby is born to put it around her shoulders: it is at this point as her wild birthing energy comes down that she may be vulnerable to catching a chill.
  • Blankets, for both of you.
  • Slippers she can easily slip on and off. 
  • A 'tens' machine.  With a spare set of batteries. 
  • Phone charger, and money for parking meters.
  • Music - on a simple, portable device.
  • Your succinct 'birth plan' - very clear, very short.      
  • An acupuncturist